Fitter at Forty

Over the past few years, blogging has had to be pushed to the background as I have focused on raising children, supporting my husband in his teaching and music pursuits (and he in my music pursuits and other interests), and doing it all within a fairly small budget. Our last child is now two years old and this past summer I decided to make good on what I had been promising myself for years. Now that there will be no more pregnancies with all the weight fluctuation and hormonal changes that brings, I wanted to get back to my slimmer self and gain control over some unhealthy issues I had with food. This wasn't only a desire to look better but to feel better and be healthier. Six pregnancies (and five babies) took its toll on my health and body and now I felt I could and should focus a bit more on myself so that I have more to give my family.

Initially my goal was to exercise more rigorously every day in an effort to lose weight, so I left early each morning for a brisk walk, ear buds inserted. I really enjoyed that time to myself and looked forward to it each day. It was good for my physical and emotional health, and my stamina increased--but I didn't lose any weight. So I thought, okay, I must need to tweak my eating habits as well, but I didn't know what. I had the gut feeling that my issues might be related to some hormones being out of whack and started looking up books that could teach me about that. I came across two books that looked promising and checked them out at my local library. They provided a wealth of information and many things rang true to me.

In her book The Hormone Reset Diet, Sara Gottfried explains the different functions of each hormone and what happens when they are adversely affected by things like poor diet, too much stress, bad sleep habits, and even environmental factors. Taking the survey at the beginning of the book helped me pinpoint where my problems were and with which probable hormones, which gave me a springboard for action.

I knew that many things wouldn't be an issue for me, like alcohol or caffeine, but others, like sugar, gluten, and dairy, would be very difficult. Going off sugar wouldn't be too bad--I'd done that plenty of times in my life--but I'd never tried to go off all gluten or dairy products. I was a little apprehensive about trying something so drastic, but the more I read and listened to my body and thought about the results I wanted, the more I felt that this was something I needed to do. Knowing that "diets" are so often ineffective or harmful because people don't/can't maintain them, I suspected that many of the changes I made needed to be permanent. So I needed to commit myself to being all in. While my kids didn't like the change in routine (though the food I made for them didn't change much), my husband was very supportive, which helped a lot. Everyone needs a cheerleader and sounding board when they're making a significant change like this!

Gottfried's approach seemed a bit overwhelming at first, but as I became more acquainted with it, I realized that she takes it one thing at a time, which helps it seem doable--particularly for women, for whom this diet is geared toward. In other words, rather than going "cold turkey" on everything at once, you give up one thing at a time in three day increments. So, while you are further restricting yourself every three days, it's still easier than restricting everything all at the same time. For example, the first reset you go meatless (red meat) to reset your estrogen and the second reset you go sugarless to reset insulin. The third reset is for leptin, which I suspected, for me, was broken, or at least limping along. (Leptin is the hormone that helps you know when you're satisfied and should stop eating.) I'd never restricted fruits before, so that was definitely something new for me and I started feeling the deprivation that is common at the beginning of a new diet. As it turned out, that was a feeling that was to remain my almost constant companion for about two weeks, as I gave up grains and dairy in turn. Those first two weeks were definitely the hardest as I dealt with things like regular hunger, fuzzy thinking, and light-headedness, and I have to admit that wasn't a very fun time in my life. But I was committed and just kept plugging along, focused on my goal.

One thing to be wary of in learning about new diets is their claims about how much weight you can lose in a specified small amount of time. In this case, it was 15 pounds in three weeks. That was how much weight I initially wanted to lose and the idea that I could in less than a month kept me going. But what such claims don't factor into account is that everyone's bodies are different and respond differently and at different times. So in my case, I wasn't way overweight (just uncomfortable in my own skin) and wasn't eating the traditional bad American diet. I already had many good health and diet habits that I had maintained for years and this reset diet wasn't going to magically melt off my extra pounds in three weeks. That was kind of a hard lesson to realize. In fact, it actually took me two weeks to lose two or three pounds! (As I recorded in my food journal, "I must have been eating better than I thought.") What kept me going--and I think this is critical in any diet change--is that I felt better. My stomach was flatter than it had been in a long while, I didn't feel bloated or gassy any more, and I no longer had an energy crash after lunch every day. So I knew something was working.

Another factor in creating a lasting change in diet, losing weight, and/or improving your fitness level is keeping a record. I learned that 1) keeping a health journal or diary and 2) recording what you eat for every meal is crucial to success. The first provides perspective--the ability to look back and see that yes, real progress has been made, even if not in the ways you expected. It also gives you a place to write your goals so you can see them regularly and remember why you're doing this--and reach them! The second provides accountability. Recording what you eat is a small (and often inconvenient) thing to commit to, but when you know you're going to have to record that snack or sweet, it does make you pause and consider if you really need it or if you could make a healthier choice.

On August 12, 2019 I wrote in my food diary: "My goal for this reset is to lose 15 pounds, to feel more energetic throughout the day, to be able to sleep better (consistently), and to feel more comfortable and confident in my own skin (not so self-conscious). Also, to have greater clarity of thought."

By August 18th, I had found an app for my phone that helped immensely in accurately recording my foods and their carb, calorie, and protein amounts to help me stay on track. Trying to find all that information online for each food was just way too time intensive! I had also learned that eating a pound of veggies a day was harder than I expected. Typically our family dinner is focused around vegetables (we still get a Bountiful Basket each week), so I thought I was already eating quite a bit of veggies. But making an effort to eat a minimum of three cups of vegetables a day has really changed things for me. Now I truly love vegetables in a way I never have before and I want to eat them at every meal and miss them when I can't. I even like beets now (when I used to hate them)! It really is true what Gottfried says about our taste buds regenerating every two weeks. In two weeks I had trained my body to want more healthful foods and my taste buds regenerated to agree with those desires so that I enjoyed my improved diet more than I thought possible. I learned that it is possible to survive without cheese and re-learned how good lemon/lime water is for those times when I want to snack but need to hold off.

Throughout this hormone reset experiment the word "nourish" kept coming to mind. I felt like the varied foods I was eating nurtured my body in a way I'd never experienced before and it made me feel that I loved and was taking care of myself. Instead of just eating what I knew would most fill me up and keep me full longer (namely a lot of whole wheat products), I was eating what would nourish my body with a variety of nutrients.

One big thing I focused on quite well for a while (and need to get back to) was my sleep. Science has proven that good sleep fosters healthy weight and I have long known how important adequate sleep is to my personal health and wellness. Gottfried recommends helping the mind and body prepare for sleep by taking nightly baths with epsom salts and essential oils. I've always been a shower person, but I really enjoyed getting back to baths and allowing myself that time to slow down and unwind. As the mother of five, it's not always possible to arrange this, but when I can do it it's a helpful routine--part of the "nourish" concept.

I did learn that keeping carbs to 75 g per day was very difficult and I hated feeling like carbs were the enemy. After some time I upped my limit to 100 g and that was much easier. I add fiber powder to my breakfast shake each morning but otherwise I prefer to get my fiber from foods in their natural form--which really seems impossible when you're keeping carbs to 75 g a day!

About this time I felt I should incorporate some of what I learned in the second book I checked out from the library, The Adrenal Reset Diet by Alan Christianson. I have always understood the importance of complex carbs and whole grains and their health benefits, and I didn't want to deprive my body of that. Christianson's focus is on strategically increasing carbs throughout the day so that dinner contains much more carbs than breakfast, since carbs increase cortisol output, which naturally helps our bodies prepare for sleep. (Did I mention how important quality sleep is to a healthy weight?)

Not surprisingly, I learned that I had been eating too much sugar and that I need to keep sugar and breads to a minimum because they are "avalanche foods" for me--meaning they are foods that, once I start eating, I have a hard time stopping or eating in moderation. And I learned that while 100% whole wheat bread is the best bread choice (which I've eaten all my life), it's still basically "refined" when it comes to how the body processes it, as opposed to eating whole wheat, brown rice, quinoa, etc, which are eaten in their natural state.

Even though I have lost those 15 pounds I wanted to at the beginning, I would still like to lose another five or more to get back to the weight I was when I got married. I'm not totally sure that's possible, but I think it might be. I figure as long as I keep getting back on the bandwagon when I fall off and keep making an effort to continue exercising five days a week and being as active as I can, nourishing my body as well as I can, my body will do what it should do. In the meantime, I have quietly reveled in the accomplishment of losing three inches around my hips and dropping 2-3 pant sizes (depending on the pants--since sizing practices have changed over the years). I am thrilled to have a little "thigh gap" back and to have a better body image and food relationship.

So the quest continues... Onward and upward!